Recently I was invited for my class reunion but I rejected the invite and did not go to my class reunion. I am not going to say which school I go to or what was the event but I will tell you why I do not wish to go. I did not specifically tell my old schoolmates why I do not want to go. The only thing that they knew was that I was “too busy with work” which is exactly what happen on that same class reunion day but I have other reasons for not going to the class reunion.
Class Reunions are organised so that you have the opportunity to see and mingle with old schoolmates; get to know them all over again; to check out what have they been doing; how they look like now; whether they are already married; how many children they have, etc. Generally just wanting to know what the other person has been doing since leaving school. But that is the exact thing that I am trying to AVOID.
Basically I am a different person now. I am a better person than I was in school. I have matured, older, wiser and responsible. So, when I was invited to the Class Reunion, I do not wish to revert back to that same person when I was in school. I do not wish to remember those moments in time of my life where my life was miserable and especially, I do not wish to see those same ex-school bullies.
The funny thing about meeting an old schoolmate or classmate is that you tend to have the impression that everything stays the same and that same person character and behaviour is the same. So, when you meet him/her, you tend to treat him/her as the same way as what you have been treating him/her when both of you were in school. I don’t mean it as in literally the same but the nuances in that person behaviour and yourself, the body language, the tone of voice, the language and the message that you are trying to put across to your ex-classmates/schoolmates seems to make you and your ex-classmates/schoolmates to revert back to your old self.
And that is what I am trying to avoid. I do not wish for them to treat me as what they have treated me while I was in school. Generally, school was a not a fun place for me even though there were some very good fun memories while I was in school. The bad memories offset the good memories by a large margin.
The funny thing is, when I am older and wiser; and when I see my old ex-schoolmates, especially the ex-bullies either while waiting for a bus or in the mrt, we treat like good old pals… like nothing happen. Like all the bullying was ancient history and everything is alright. Well, normally when I do see them, I would also treat it like nothing has happen and we were “best of pals” but secretly I was hoping that I would not want to see you again.. :-) I would take a different train or I would take a different bus or I would even try to cycle to work just to avoid you. I hope that you would also take a different bus or train and our meeting was only by chance and this is a fluke. If you ask for my phone no. I would probably give you a wrong number or I will give you the correct number and then I will change my phone number. I will try my best to avoid you at all cost.
Now, when we are older, we have nothing in common to each other. The only thing that we had in common was in the past with the same school teacher. So, what do you expect would the conversation to go in a Class Reunion for me? The conversation would probably sound like this:--
Bully No. 1 : Hey Fritz! How are you doing? I thought you die already!!.. Hah ha hah
Fritz : No Lah!.,.. still alive! (ggrrrrr).
Bully No. 1 : Hey! You remember the time that I kick you in the butt.. literally?
Fritz : Oh yeah.. and I do remember it was YOU.. (Gggggrrrr…)
Bully No. 1 : Hah Hah Hah.. it was fun times, was it? You were sooo funny!!..
Fritz : hmm… yeah… (ggrrrrrr..)
Bully No. 2 : Oh yeah!!.. you haven’t change a bit! Still young leh.. I remember that I use kick your legs while we were playing soccer… it was a very good soccer match…
Fritz : hmm.. yeah… it was painful then and it is painful now..
Bully No. 2 : After we lose that soccer match, we were so angry that we try to beat you up but you ran away like a fried chicken.. hah hah hah.. you were soo fast!! You should have join the athletics club.
Fritz : Oh yeah.. sure sure… that’s funny.. running away like a fried chicken.. heh heh (sarcastic laugh). There were 5 of you running after me, to beat me up. What do you expect? Have to run away mah!!... I am not Jackie Chan!!.. heh heh.. (sacarstic laugh)
Bully No. 1 : Hah HHa Hha Hah hah
Bully No. 2 : Hahh Hahh Hah.. you are soo funny!!.. Oklah, later buddy. Both of us catch you later, we need to go see someone else… GET it? CATCH you later?... heh heh heh
Fritz : Ya Ya Ya…. I GET it… (Gggggggrrrrrr….)
SO! No Class Reunions for me .. EVER!! I am Not ever ever going to any school reunions, class reunions of any other reunions. I like who I am now and I do not wish to meet these people. It is just tooooo troublesome.
We have nothing in common now. They have their own lives and I have my own. I do not wish to be involve in their lives and hopefully I do not wish for them to get involve in my lives. There are some ex-schoolmates that I do wish to see and meet tho but then we are now two very different people with different lives and again, I don’t think we have anything else in common other than the past. The conversation would probably be mostly about reminiscence about the past. The things that we did, the joy of school, the bad things that we did, the good teachers, the bad teachers, the worst teachers, who get caned, who stole stuff, what happened to that guy/girl; etc. Other than recounting events in the past, we have nothing in common now.
For myself, I tend to look forward rather than backward. But I will sometimes recount the moments in my past to my current group of friends. Who doesn’t? I will enjoy and treasure the moments of joy in my past but in my own free time. For others, who enjoy meeting their schoolmates, my advice is, go to your school reunions or class reunions because the joy of meeting your best friends is the best medicine for happiness. For myself, I think I’ll passed.
Once in a while I met my old schoolmates that I do like while on the road, bus, mrt, shopping centre, etc and we talk and recounted the past. It was a good conversation but that is it. The old schoolmate will go his/her way and I will go mine. And we just leave it as it is. I prefer to be with my current group of friends and co-workers that I do like now rather than living in the past.
Regards,
Fritz
Ps: Also, there’s the other matter of me paying a sum of money to pay for the class/school reunion food and location of event? I have to pay for it? Hell… NO way man!! Why should I pay $20 to $50 bucks for the reunion that I don’t like?.. I rather save that money for my increased taxi fare!..
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